I had not imagined the first night in my new house like this, in fact I had not even thought about the first night in my house but I never thought I would be throwing things at my husband while he is at the other side of the bed. I had got out of the water before I did something I might regret. I took a towel and wrapped myself around it while I searched for jeans in the walk in closet. He came behind me and hugged me. When I tried to push him off he held me tight that was when I started fighting and soon I found myself throwing him with my shoes and clothes in the bed room.
Henry: Trisha, baby… can you please put that shoe down, someone could get hurt… I could get hurt
Me: and why should I care if you get hurt henry… tell me because it’s obvious that you don’t care if I get hurt?
Henry: it’s not like that baby…. I care it’s just that…
I threw the shoe at him and I missed him. The shoe hit the
Me: just shut up…. Leave me alone okay, I want to think.
Me: I said leave…. Leave
He went out the room and in a matter of seconds I heard the sound of the car leaving the yard. I sat down on the floor by the bed and tears made their way out, I just couldn’t believe henry would keep such a big thing from me. I felt someone holding my hand. When I opened my eyes Emily stood before me and she sat on my laps. I held her close to me and tried to hold my tears but I just couldn’t.
Emily: mommy… why are you crying?
I couldn’t reply her and I couldn’t even bare to look her in face
Emily: did you have a fight with daddy
Her tiny hands hold my face and I looked at her. She wiped my tears and I held her hands and wiped my face.
Emily: you know mommy it doesn’t matter how much daddy can make you cry, I know that he loves you so much because he always tells me that. And it doesn’t matter that he makes you cry I will always be here to wipe your tears away and give you a smile, because I love you.
I looked up at the ceiling because her words were pouring tears to my eyes.
Emily: besides you know how man can be… right. They are hopeless.
I looked at her a little bit startled at her words then I smiled at her and she also laughed.
Emily: see, I told you that I will always be here to make you smile.
I kissed her forehead.
Me: oh Emily, you are something else.
She gave her sweetest smile and I hugged her again.
Me: you should me asleep by now, why did you wake up.
Emily: are you seriously asking me that question? I mean you were yelling so loud with dad…. How could I sleep.
I looked at her a little bit offended by her words but then she is a child and she is going to say whatever comes to her mind. I felt guilt creeping in. I carried her to her room.
Me: you are right… I was a bit loud, forgive me baby. Ok.
I tucked her in and sang for her again until she slept. I watched her sleep for a few minutes then came realization of how much I adored my little baby. Since her mother is alive what’s going to happen, will I have to give her up. I had gotten so used to the fact that she is my daughter. While I was still thinking about her a very disturbing thought came to my mind. Henry had told me that he will surely kill himself if he ever hurt me again, and he surely did hurt me and I got so furious that I told him to leave…
Panic kicked in, what if he decides to kill himself by doing a car accident? Or maybe drive over a cliff? What if he never returns? I shouldn’t have told him to leave
I stood up and ran to my room. I searched for the phone and found it in my jeans in the bath room. I dialed his number with trembling hands and the phone fell then went off. I felt like screaming at the moment. I searched switched it on and wanted the longest 2 minutes for it to reboot. As soon as it had kicked up I dialed the number and called him. He didn’t answer, I called him again and he still didn’t answer. I felt my heart getting heavy and tears gushed out he still didn’t answer this time I decided to leave him a voice message.
Me: henry… please answer my calls
My voice was shaking and I tried to call him again. He still didn’t answer after five missed calls I left him another voice message.
Me: henry, please answer my calls and come back home okay…. If you have not arrived after 10 minutes I am going out to find you.
I threw my phone on the bed then I sat down and tried to wait. After a few minutes I took my phone to check the time… only 2 minutes had passed and it felt like I had waited the whole 10 minutes.
I decided to go and get dressed. I put on my jeans and top then sleepers. Then I waited a few minutes when I checked the time, only five minutes had passed. I took a deep breath then went downstairs and took my car keys from the wall key holder. I sat on the couch and tried calling him, he still didn’t answer.
My mind was racing with possibilities of him not answering. Fist he cou8ld be in a car accident, second he could have killed himself, third he could have drove over cliff… which cliff? I don’t know maybe there is a cliff somewhere, what if he has a gun?
I quailed at my thoughts and tears came rushing again. I kept wiped my tears and took my phone then headed to the door, I wasn’t going to wait anymore I mean the moment that I am here waiting it could be the moments that something bad is happening to him.
I opened the door and he was standing outside.
What a relief…
Henry: I was just about to get in, where are you going?
Me: you are here?
I jumped up to him and hugged him, holding him tight and tears came down on a marathon. I was just so relieved that he is back home safe.
Henry: hey, what happened?
I kept on crying and he carried me to the couch. Once I stopped crying I slapped him. He looked at me with horror all over his face but I didn’t care. He made me worry so much.
Me: why did you leave so late in the night, do you have any idea how worried I was, huh… why didn’t you answer your phone and why didn’t you call me back, what if something had happened to you? What if you got in an accident? What if you had hurt yourself?
Henry: hey, hey, hey, I am back home safe right…
Me: why didn’t you answer your phone?
Henry: my phone is at the bedroom upstairs and it’s on silent.
Me: why did you leave your phone?
Henry: I forgot it… okay
Me: don’t you ever do that to me… ever again.
He wiped my tears away and hugged me. I closed my eyes and rested on his chest allowing my mind to calm down. Then I suddenly recalled that this man holding me in his arms just told me Emily’s mother is alive and he knew about it all along. I pulled back and looked at him with anger.
The f--k… this man must not test my temper
Me: henry Tyson… why the f--k did you lie to me.
Henry: we are back to that
Me: what? Did you think it was over?
Henry: you changed so fast from you being so sad and frightened to you being angry
I hissed at him. Does he think that this is funny?
Me: you know henry, every mistake you do always goes back to our roots.
Me: let me finish talking, it’s like maybe we did a grave mistake by getting married. It’s like we are based on lies… first you set Zenzie up, and then you lied to me about the mother of your child… Honestly I am starting to wonder what else you have been lying to me about.
Henry: honestly though baby… you have so scared a few minutes ago it’s not healthy for you to change your mood so fast, why don’t we deal with this tomorrow.
My mouth dropped. I couldn’t believe he was the one to say that.
Me: you know what… you’re right we will deal with this tomorrow.
I took the keys of the rooms and I stomped upstairs to our room and he followed me, I grabbed a blanket and threw it at him. Then I locked the spare bedroom upstairs and headed downstairs to lock the guest room.
Me: you are sleeping on the couch
Henry: you are being unreasonable right now
Me: of course I am, were you being reasonable when you chose to lie to everyone about Emily’s mother?
Henry: that was different.
Me: so is this.
Henry: you know mom would have never allowed this to happen
Me: too bad she isn’t here
I went upstairs and laid down looking up then I saw my name in the ceiling written in monotype Corsiva and little red and white bulbs are lighting it up. It’s very beautiful. I turn to his wondering why he always had to act stupid. I held his pillow close to me then my stomach grumbles reminding me that I am very hungry even though i had a full lunch and full supper.
I took his pillow and went downstairs. I threw the pillow at him and went to open up the double doors of the fridge.
Henry: you okay?
I ignored him as I search of what I would really like to eat. I thought about the peanut butter, I have always wanted to eat the butter plain but when I grew up I actually thought it was stupid and unhealthy which is actually funny because right now, I am feeling the butter. I take out and close the fridge then I went to the unit and I open up the liquor shelf and take out a bottle of whiskey and then a spoon. When I turn henry is staring at me and I can’t help but wonder if he is judging my choice of food.
Henry: a night to remember isn’t it.
I ignore him because I am not talking to him right now. I head upstairs and seat on the bed eating the peanut butter and it tastes so good. It sticks to the tongue making it heavy. I fill up my mouth with three big spoons and chew the butter with so much anger as I think about henry and what’s going to happen after this.
When I start feeling like my chest is filling up with too much oil I put the peanut butter bottle away and drink half the bottle of whiskey at one go. Then I catch a breath and finish up the bottle. I can’t remember ever drinking whisky this fast and is there anyone who ever did that. I sign as I realize that I was realizing all my frustrations with the food.
The fact that I am questioning my marriage right now makes me want to scream and cry and literally kill someone. I threw the bottle at the bottle at the glass wall screaming and the bottle smashed into small pieces but the wall didn’t even register a small scratch.
I lie on the bed and cry myself to sleep.
The next day I was woken up by a throbbing head headache and the urgent need to throw up. I get of the bed hurrying to the rest rooms. My stomach turns over everything I ate last night over to my mouth. When I feel better I stand up and take a shower.
I had some painkillers but my head is not giving me a break right now and I know that it’s the results of drinking the way I did last night. I quickly clean up and make breakfast for henry and Emily before I head out to see Tracy at the airport.
After I say my goodbye to Tracy I head to the nearest coffee shop and order the strongest coffee they had. I sat down there for hours thinking about what Henry told me last night. I keep on ignoring the incoming calls from henry. He should know that I am really pissed off right now and I really don’t want to talk to him.
When I finally decided on how to handle the situation at hand I stand to leave only to see henry stomping in to the coffee shop. I sit back and wait for him to sit down.
Henry: why did you leave without telling me?
He is angry now…. Oh for heaven’s sake, he should be begging for my forgiveness right now. I roll my eyes at him and call the waiter for a refill because I sense that my stay here is extended.
Henry: don’t you dare ignore me Trisha
Me: I don’t report to you henry… just like you don’t report to me.
How closes his eyes for a brief moment and seat across me
Henry: look I said I am sorry
Me: I feel like you tricked me into marrying you.
Henry: what do you want me to do?
Me: I feel like you don’t trust me at all
Henry: baby I trust you completely
Me: then you would have told me henry… where is Emily right now?
Henry: with mother
Me: Emily’s mother… was she really a one night stand?
Henry: no actually
Me: she was your girlfriend
Henry: no baby, she was my personal assistant
Could this get anymore worse?
Me: you used to f--k your PA
Henry: it was just when I needed to relieve some stress
Me: oh God…! She really assisted you personally.
The thought made me want to hurl… what do some ladies take themselves for?
Me: I want to meet Emily’s mother
He widens his eyes and then leans over to me.
Henry: are you sure
Me: henry… I want to meet Emily’s mother and now, call her or go and get her I am sure you know where she stays
In the next fifteen minutes a lady enters the restaurant wearing shorts and a V-neck top looking very gorgeous with her styled extra-long kinky hair and flats. She comes straight to us and nervously smiles at henry.
Henry: hi Stella this is Trisha my wife and Trisha this is Stella
Stella: nice to meet you Trisha
Is it? Well I am sorry it’s not the same for me. I can’t help but roll my eyes at her
Me: you can sit down
She looks at henry and throws her nervous smile at him. She sits next to henry and turns to me. I seriously want him tell her to change seats with me but then I just keep silent and look at her observing her face. She looks so much like Emily and all this time i thought Emily got her beauty from her father.
Me: so you are Emily’s birth mother
What do I say to you shameless woman
Me: why did you abandon Emily?
Stella: actually I didn’t…
I raised my hand to cut her from talking, she has a nerve to deny what she did
Me: Do you have any idea what Emily has been going through while you were out there, where the hell have you been and what do you want from us now?
Stella: didn’t Henry tell you?
Woman! I will give you a tight slap right now. Answer my question. I hiss my eyes at her
Stella: I was at…
She looks at henry as if asking for permission from him. This is seriously pissing me off, I sip my tea shutting down the edge to tell her to stop looking at my husband.
I choke on my tea and it splutters all over my top. Henry quickly stands to help me. I give a back off look and he sits back down.
Ok, did she just say she was at prison?
Me: what the f--k where you doing in prison
Stella: I was serving a five year sentence
Me: for what
Stella: attempted murder
Me: attempted murder?
Is this a joke…? Because it’s not funny
Me: who did you want to kill?
Her nervous face fades and then paint brushes over her
Stella: my father
Oh jeez, this is depressing. Who would want to kill her father and why?
Stella: I would rather not talk about it
Me: ok, what do you want with Emily
The nervous smile and face are back on
Stella: I just want to be part of her life
My anger evaporated just like that, I don’t know why I feel as if her sentenced just confirmed my worst fears. I close my eyes as a knot form in my throat. She wants to take my Emily away from me. I have a sudden urge to cry my eyes out. I open my eyes lazily and look at them both
Me: what do you mean you want to be part of her life/
Stella: you know
Me: I know…? I don’t know anything Stella, I thought you were dead then you suddenly appear from heaven knows where and you want to take my baby away
Her mouth pops open and then she Stella: that’s not what I meant… I just want her to know me
I don’t want to continue this conversation
Me: for how long have you been out?
Stella: since December
Me: and I understand that you have been having some time out with Emily
Stella: yes it’s only been three weeks
I look at henry, and he just looked regretful
Me: for so long and I didn’t know
Stella: I am sorry I really thought you knew… I… I texted you and you agreed
Me: I agreed
I looked at henry and his eyes fell down, he must be the one responsible for that.
Me: I am going
I stood up.
Henry: where are you going?
Me: I don’t know
I stomped off the coffee shop leaving them together. In a matter of seconds I found myself at the Tyson house. I don’t know why but I went straight to Mrs. Tyson. She was reading a novel and I just stared at her until she looked up
Mrs. Tyson: Trisha
I threw myself on the floor before her and buried myself in her laps as I cried. I partly asked myself if anyone has ever done this to her but I didn’t care all I knew was that I needed her to comfort me and tell me that everything will be fine, my marriage is not in jeopardy and no one will take my child away from me because right now I feel messed up big time.
Enticed episode 26